The Comparison of Differences Between the Contemporary Chinese Wedding Culture and the Western One

论文总字数：25183字

摘 要

婚礼是一个人一生中的转折点，也是一种文化的有机组成部分，它在经济全球化与文化多元化发展中起着重要作用。在文化差异的影响下，中西方的婚礼习俗也各不相同。本文旨探讨中西方婚礼在礼仪，禁忌，仪式顺序，色彩和婚礼媒介等方面的差异。接着从历史文化、信仰、价值观等方面分析产生这些差异的原因，从而加大中西方不同文化的交流与融合。

关键词：中国婚礼习俗；西方婚礼习俗；差异；原因

Contents

1. Introduction……………………………………….……………………1
2. Literature Review………………………….………..…………………1
   1. Opinions of Chinese wedding cultures……......…….….....……………1
   2. Opinions of Western wedding cultures.....………………………..…….1
3. Chinese Wedding Customs ………….………………………………...2
   1. Etiquettes and customs at the Chinese wedding…..........…………........2
   2. Taboos at the Chinese wedding……………………..........…………...3
   3. The order of Chinese wedding ceremony……………..........…………..4
   4. Color…………….…………………..........……………………………..5
   5. Marriage media………………………..........…………………………..5
4. Western Wedding Customs …………….…….……………………….5
   1. Etiquettes and customs at the Western wedding…...............…………...6
   2. Taboos at the Western wedding………….……..................…………….6
   3. The order of Western wedding ceremony………..........………………..7
   4. Color…….……………………….............……......…………………….8
   5. Marriage media……………………………..........…..…………………8
5. Reasons for Differences………………………………………………..8
   1. Different historic cultures……………….......………………………….8
   2. Different religious values…………………....………………………….9
6. Conclusion………………………...……………..……………………10

Works Cited…………………………………….…………………….…...12

1. Introduction

For any country, wedding is one of the most important events in people’s life. With the development of economic globalization and international exchange, the wedding cultures between China and Western countries are gradually spread.

This thesis aims to discuss the different wedding customs between China and Western countries. It is extremely significant to study the different cultures between China and Western countries, which will help us to understand different cultures and respect each other’s customs, in order that we can get the best effect of the world’s communication.

2. Literature Review

2.1Opinions of Chinese wedding cultures

In China, Cheng Yuzhen has written a famous book named Introduction of Chinese Culture (2011). It has depicted many customs of Chinese marriage cultures, from the very beginning of Chinese history to what it is today when our traditional culture is being struck by Western cultures. It also illustrates some marriage cultures of minorities, such as Naxi ethnic which settle in Yunnan and retain many ancient customs. The book Intercultural Communication Series(1999) written by Hu Wenzhong is about the comparisons between different cultures. The book has listed many differences in marriage cultures, and pointed out their origins. It has a general outlook to intercultural communication. Besides, some other humanists have written some books about this topic, for instance, Foundations of Intercultural Communication(1998) written by Chen Guoming.

2.2Opinions of Western wedding cultures

As for the Western marriage cultures, some foreign experts have also done some researches and written some books. Zhang Weidong has written a book called Introduction of Western Culture (2008). It briefly described a series of programs of wedding, including proposal, engagement, wedding, honeymoon and so on. It also explained the religious reason for several trivial matters. The book 100-year History of Western Marriage Cultures (2000) written by Mary Windsor offered much information about Western marriage cultures. In addition, several influential intercultural communication scholars have done some works to this subject, such as English Across Cultures, Cultures Across English (1989) written by Garcia, Oamp; Otheguy, R. , and American Cultural Patterns: A Cross-Cultural Perspective written by Stewart, E. amp; Bennet, M.

3. Chinese Wedding Customs

3.1 Etiquettes and customs at the Chinese wedding

3.1.1 Exchange birth dates

To arrange a marriage, the groom"s family will request for the bride"s "Eight Letters" through the matchmaker. If the bride and the groom"s birthdates are suitable (meaning that no disaster or something unfortunate is predicted by the fortune teller if they get married), the two families will reach an agreement on the event. Then the fortune teller will select a ‘good day’ to hold the wedding ceremony according to the bride and groom’s birthdates.

3.1.2Send gifts to bride’s family

Nowadays, the groom’s family usually picks a "good day" to send gifts to the bride"s family, which includes gifts, cash, cakes, ‘monetary gift’ and so on. Usually, most families consult the Chinese calendar to pick a "good day" which indicates happiness and fortune for the new couple to get married.

As for the "monetary gift", the negotiation will focus on how many tables the groom is able to offer to the bride"s family during the wedding banquet. Usually, the groom’s family will pay a certain amount to the bride’s family which is dependent on their number of guests. If the groom’s family cannot afford all the cost, the bride’s family will compromise.

3.1.3Prepare the chamber

Before the formal day of wedding ceremony, the groom’s family must lay out a bridal chamber to the newly married couples. The chamber should be decorated with red things, because Chinese people insist that "red" can bring happiness and good luck. Besides, the groom must prepare some ‘red packets’ with some money packaged in it. People think symbolizes good luck. On the wedding day, the groom should give them to those who helped them, such as his bride’s relatives and their friends.

3.1.4Prepare dowry for the bride

In the bride’s family, parents always prepare some dowries for their daughter, including a scissor, a ruler, some quilts, and so on. On the wedding day, the bride will bring all the dowries to the groom’s family, which means bring a good wish for their rich and nice life.

3.2Taboos at the Chinese wedding

Influenced by Chinese historic cultures, there are many taboos at the wedding ceremony. Firstly, all the things prepared for the wedding must in pairs because people think good things come in pairs. Secondly, on the day of wedding, people cannot say any bad words which will bring something bad to the couple.

3.3 The order of Chinese wedding ceremony

3.3.1Fetch the bride

In the morning of the wedding day, the groom and the groomsmen will decorate the cars with flowers and then drive to the bride’s home. At the same time, the bride is dressed up at her home, waiting for the groom. When the groom drives close to the bride’s home, the firecrackers should be set off. When they arrive at the bride’s home, they will inevitably be blocked at the door by the bridesmaids. Then, the bridesmaids will ask a lot of tricking questions for the groom, even request the groom to sing out his love for the bride in front of all the people. The groom and groomsmen must try their best to meet all the requests of the bridesmaids, or they will not meet the bride. In China, the most specific test is financial test. The groom must prepare some ‘red packets’ to pay for the bridesmaids as gifts, if the bridesmaids feel satisfied, they will open the door. Then the groom and the groomsmen can enter the house and fetch the bride.

When the groom meets his bride, they can say goodbye to the bride’s relatives and friends. Then they can return to the groom’s home. On the way to the groom’s home, the firecrackers should be set off again. For Chinese people, marriage is one of the most important things in one’s life, so people are happy to use this manner to show their delight.

3.3.2 Perform the formal wedding ceremony

When the couple arrives at the groom’s home, people will light firecrackers to celebrate the important moment. After that, the bride and groom will walk across the red blanket, shoulder by shoulder. Then the groom’s parents will give them some presents, often ‘red packets’ or jewelry for the bride. Each of the guests at the feast also needs to present a monetary gift to the couple.

The wedding banquet formally begins, which is considered to be very important at the wedding ceremony. This is more of an event than any other part of the wedding. For most parents, the wedding feast is a vital chance to return their kindness to the relatives. If the wedding feast turns out to be good, the parents will feel they have ‘face’,. Chinese people take great notice of ‘face’, it means to be respected by others.

The menu often includes about twelve courses: appetizer, roast pig, abalone, shark fin soup, fried rice or noodles, dessert, and fresh fruit. Besides the delicacies served, some nice wine and beverage are also being served. During the feast, the guests are seated in round tables. When serving the shark fin soup, the newly married couple will go from table to table, toasting the guests to thank them. The guests will also toast the bride and groom in return.

3.3.4 Disturb the nuptial

After the wedding feast, most of the guests will leave, but the groomsmen, bridesmaids and some close friends of the young couple will often stay to make fun of the newly married couple in their bridal chamber. Usually, they play games. The goal is to make the groom show his love to the bride in public. Chinese people believe that the more seriously the newly married couple is disturbed, the happier they will be in their future life. Therefore, their friends always make things difficult for the bride and the groom in many ways. Until all the friends stop and leave, the whole wedding ends.

3.4Color

Influenced by Western customs, Chinese brides now also wear white wedding dress. But the whole wedding is also filled with bright red color everywhere, such as the chamber and the car. Red is a symbol of Chinese tradition, a symbol of happiness, prosperity, and good luck. The bright colors make the wedding ceremony filled with laugh and happiness.

3.5Marriage media

In Chinese wedding, matchmaker plays an important role during the whole process of wedding. They are usually women. The matchmaker deals a great of problems between the two families. She is the compere of the wedding ceremony, the bride and groom are directed by her to finish the ceremony.

4. Western wedding customs

4.1 Etiquettes and customs at the Western wedding

4.1.1 Engagement

In Western countries, engagement is the prelude of the formal wedding. To sum up, the engagement is accomplished in four steps. The first step is to ask the permission of the bride’s family. When two families agree with the event, they will negotiate the dowries together. Ring, is the indispensable one. Ring is produced by heat energy and press, so it is considered as the best symbol of forever love. Next, the couple will select a day to hold the wedding ceremony. They will invite their relatives and friends to attend their engagement party, and the groom will send the ring to his bride in order to show his promise of forever love.

4.1.2 Something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue, and a silver sixpence in her shoe

For the bride, ‘Something Old, Something New, Something Borrowed, Something Blue, and a Silver Sixpence in Her Shoe’ ,which represents fortune, is required. ‘Something old’ refers to something belonging to the bride’s family, like her mother’s jewelry, it symbolizes the continuity with the bride’s family and the past. ‘Something new’ symbolizes an optimistic start and a hopeful future for the new couple. ‘Something borrowed’ is usually something from the bride’s friend who married happily, she will convey her good fortune to the bride. ‘Something blue’ means the bride must wear something blue, which symbolizes love, pure, and loyalty, as evidenced in proverbs like ‘Marry in blue, lover be true’. ‘A silver sixpence’ dates back to a Scottish customs of a groom putting a silver coin under his foot, which symbolizes wealth and financial security.

4.2Taboos at the Western wedding

Contract to China, red is not auspicious in Western culture, so white wedding dress is not allowed to be matched with red shoes in Western countries. If the bride wears red shoes, there will be something unfortunate happen. Besides, the bride is not able to wear the white wedding gown to bow to the guests.

At the wedding ceremony, the bride must cover her face with a veil and it should not be exposed by anyone except the groom. The groom, including the groomsmen should always stand on the right, while the bride and the bridesmaid stand on the left.

   When the newly married couple goes back to their bridal chamber, the groom must hug the bride into the house and put her on the bed to avoid that the bride enter the room with her left foot first, since they think that may bring bad luck to the new family.

4.3 The order of Western wedding ceremony

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